We all need help

[graymar]

Guys,

I just want to say that I have many things to be thankful for...my health (mostly)...my children...my wife...

But, this time of year is very stressful...today is the 4 year anniversary of my Dad's death. I was out of town when it happened...and he died at my house.

Secondly, holidays always seem to be a stressful time...additionally...several of my friends are having a hard and stressful time...I try to be the voice of reason...but that drains me over time as I seem to always be the touchstone.

I always feel hypocritical by asking this...so many people have lots in life much harder than my own...but I need a little prayer for strength...to help guide me through this time.

Thank you...

Graymar

[Jerod W. Rickert]

Graymar, I appreciate your honesty and condor... I won't just say "I'll pray for you" and not do it, but I will promise that I prayed for you when I came on and saw this and will continue to try my best to keep you lifted up each time I see your name on this or other sites...

I just Pray the the God and Lord of this season would grant your heart and mind, peace and the Joy of our Savior... For Strength and Wisdom in your dealings with others... And for a season of Joy in the Truest Spirit of what Christmas means...

God Bless and Keep you and yours this most precious of seasons...

[graymar]

I hope you don't mind me sharing this...this was written by my oldest daughter about six months after my Dad's death. She was 18.

This isn't real.
Kimberly Xxxx
18 June, 2004

Do you remember when I was 3
& you took me to the parade downtown?
We sat atop the old parking garage
(it's a convention center now) &
you watched me with the same wonder
that I gave the clowns & floats
& maybe we floated that day, I
can't remember, but I know that
you were there, because it was
when you cigarette popped by balloon
but I was okay.

I'm okay.

I counted how long it's been since
I last saw you, & it ended up being
6 months, 21 days, & 18 hours
but it's been longer now. You've
missed so many things! I know
that it wasn't your fault, but I couldn't
even tell you about my trip to France.
My trip to France! My trip to France!
I've talked about it so many times
(just ask my friends), but I think
I could talk about it again.

Just for you.

Just for you I would drive
to South Knoxville and battle the
autos of Farragut (honk, honk, screech)
to find myself in a forlorn field, dotted
here & there by stones, one of which they
tell me you're under (but I don't believe
them). So even if they're lying, I'll do
it just for you, because I miss you.

I miss you so much that I make
you up in my head & you visit me in my
dreams, or at least I think it's you,
because when I wake up I can smell
your tobacco & Old Spice
(I always hated that smell) & even though
I refuse to eat fast food [you
missed that, too] I can't help but
stop for a moment when I pass a
Hardee's, & I almost think I see
you in your red truck driving up.

I drove your red truck, I hope that's okay.

You know what?
I almost hope it's not okay, because
then you would appear & chide
(though you never have before)
& I could push past your words & hug
you, even if it was for the last time.

Mostly, because I never got a
last time.

Graymar

[Jerod W. Rickert]

WOW!!! Please pass on to your daughter how beautiful that is... she is a fantastically talented young Lady...

[breakingrote]

Amazing, your daughter must be a very profound person... Overwhelmingly beautiful.

[breakingrote]

I forgot to say Graymar, because of your daughters ardently brilliant writing, but I'll pray for you after this; because everyone, no matter who perceivably has it worse, needs help.

Ecc 4:10 For if they fall, the one will lift up his fellow: but woe to him that is alone when he falleth; for he hath not another to help him up.

[graymar]

Thanks so much for your comments.

Graymar